Searching for Connection

The start of my spiritual path began in 2010. I had just moved to New York City. I felt excited, overwhelmed, scared, and lost all at the same time.When I first arrived in NYC, I lived with a good friend of mine. I was in the process of trying to figure out what I wanted to do with my life, how to make money, and what I was interested in. I really wanted to start to get more in touch with who I was.

I started questioning more and more about why I was here, and what the purpose of life was. I was not sure of my path or purpose, and I was eager to figure it out. Religion kept coming up for me. I grew up Jewish, but my parents were not religious. I was not really sure what God meant to me, or if I even believed in something higher than myself. My friend I was living with was Christian, and kept telling me to go to church with her. I started going with her. I enjoyed the message, but felt a bit out of place. I felt almost as if I was turning on my Jewish roots.I find it interesting that these beliefs about who I should be and how I grew up, were so deeply embedded in me. I continued to go to church, seeking something greater than myself.

There was a Jewish Temple two blocks from where I was staying in midtown, so I decided to check it out. Walking in, I did not realize that this temple was a Chabad Temple. They spoke only in Hebrew, which I did not understand. In this environment, I felt a bit out of place, but I also felt this embodiment of love. I met the Rabbi and his wife, and I started going to their house for Shabbat dinners. I learned all the customs. I asked questions. I witnessed how patient, kind, loving, and present they were with their children and everyone around them. I was yearning for this. I felt like I was getting closer to understanding what God was to me.

Some of each religion resonated with me. I enjoyed the tradition each one brought. Yet, I still did not feel completely in touch with a higher power, with God, or with myself. I decided to continue going to Temple and Church to see what could open up for me.

Years go by and I move back to Florida. I decided to try yoga again. I had done it in the past, but only purely for exercise. This time I found a studio that taught philosophy,and breathwork too. I started going regularly, and felt a sense of deep relaxation and oneness with everything around me. I started studying yogic philosophy. This resonated with me because I was able to get in touch with myself. I was still yearning to understand how I could connect to God, and how I connect with this higher power.

In Yoga training, they touched on Buddhism. I decided to check out some classes at a Budhissim Temple near where I lived. I really enjoyed this message, but knew I did not want to be a monk and have no worldly material possessions. Then on my journey, I crossed paths with Kabbalah. I enjoyed this philosophy as well, because it helped me take responsibility for my own actions, and then shed and spread light on others. All of these different philosophies fascinate me.

I appreciate every philosophy and religion now. To me spirituality is not one religion or one specific principle. To me spirituality is having the awareness to know myself, to grow into the best version of myself, and to look within rather than without. All of the things I have learned on my path have helped me see this clearly.

Now I put all the principles I have learned together to form a life of deep meaning, and connection with myself and others.

At this stage of my life, I have realized that my truth is that everything and everyone are connected. There is something more to this physical world. I can feel it. I get the most in touch with myself when I sit in silence. The greatest ideas come to me then. The path for me was I had to feel lost, to go into a dark place in order to find my own path and truth.

Ask yourself, what is your truth? What is spirituality to you? How do you connect with yourself?

Dig deep into the depths of your soul, find what that little voice inside is yearning at, and go for it!